Things that make you go hmmmm.....

 

[image from here]

I have to give credit to my long lost friend Rommy (from San Francisco days) for compiling this really thought-provoking list of questions.  He's living in Sweden and keeping a blog about his experiences working and living there.  Most recently, he's doing a series of "Single in Sweden", and this particular entry discusses his challenges with making small talk with women.  Anyway, I'm going to post his questions/answers here, along with my answers.....wonder if he'd want to talk to me at a party.  Consider answering these questions for yourself, and feel free to post your answers in the comments if you are so inclined!
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So if you ever see me at a party, know that this is the kind of stuff that would make for good conversation.

• What do you like to do for fun?
  
  
  • Right answers include: spontaneous road trips, spend time alone with a book and some music, spend time outside, crossword puzzles, going head to head with a dude at downing shots of whiskey.
  • Wrong answers include: hanging out with friends, shopping, watching TV, sleeping
  • KEENAN: yoga, being outside doing just about anything, exploring new places, cook
• What was the last thing you read?
  
  
  • Right answers include: the newspaper, the subtitles in a French film, Foreign Affairs
  • Wrong answers include: gossip magazines, Perez Hilton
  • KEENAN: Elle Decor magazine, Huffington Post, Email from Whitney, calorie count on yogurt tub
• What was the last book you read?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Anything that expands the mind, makes you think. And even if it's purely a guilty pleasure, at least talking about it. Having a good, well-thought out opinion about it counts for serious bonus points.
  • Wrong answers include: Saying you don't like to read. Or complaining how you're finding your book so boring. This is a huge turnoff. Tell me why you find it that way or don't talk about it at all.
  • KEENAN: The Middle Place by Kelly Corrigan.  Loved it.  Didn't want it to end (and it's currently only $3.80 at Amazon!!!  Buy it for any woman you know!!)  Other recent reads I enjoyed are The Road by Cormac McArthy, The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, Cane River by Lalita Tademy.
• What was the greatest book you read?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Having one (or several) and telling me why you thought it (or they) was (or were) so great.
  • Wrong answers include: Not having a favorite one, not having an opinion about why it's your favorite, or The Da Vinci Code.
  • KEENAN: I really loved Katharine Graham's Personal History.  Very inspirational story about a woman who was born into a life of luxury and opportunity, but morphed into a powerful, successful, yet real woman after her husband's suicide left her in control of the Washington Post.  Great true story.  I need more favorites....time to read more classics.
• What website do you spend most of your time on?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Blogs, news sites,  your own site where you write.
  • Wrong answers include: Google, Perez Hilton, shopping sites and Facebook (even though this is true for most people, it shouldn't be among the answers, because it's simply not interesting).
  • KEENAN: does Google Reader count as a site?  Sad to say I spend too much time on Facebook.  Might have to start using the "self-control" apple app to limit my time there.....it's a waste of time, but I can't help myself!  Sorry Rommy.
• What is your favorite album of the last ten years?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Pretty much anything if you have a good reason and are passionate about it.
  • Wrong answers include: Nickelback
  • KEENAN: Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, Wilco and Fox Confessor Brings the Flood, Neko Case.  Rick introduced me to Wilco when we first met, and I'll never forget riding around in his Altima in San Francisco listening to YHF. 
• What are your hobbies?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Anything you consider to be personal, quirky, weird, crafty, outrageous. Because these are the things that are interesting. And having a hobby is so important because it's a personal passion.
  • Wrong answers include: Hanging out with friends, shopping, watching TV, sleeping. These aren't hobbies.
  • KEENAN: yoga (again), learning to use my new camera, discovering new places in DC, finding really obscure things online.... whoa, i sound sort of boring.
• How do you relax?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Going for a walk, working out, a good film, taking a day trip, laying in a park.
  • Wrong answers include: Hanging out with friends, shopping, watching TV, sleeping.
  •  KEENAN: getting fresh air, cooking, piddling at home, going for a walk, yoga
• How do you challenge yourself?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Setting stretch goals and meeting them. Doing things that present significant physical or mental challenges.
  • Wrong answers include: Saying you don't.
  •  KEENAN: currently finding a job is proving to be a challenge, trying to cut sugar out of my diet is a challenge, and I'm thinking of running my second marathon this fall.  I need more concrete challenges....
• What are you truly passionate about?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Things that take a significant time investment and are purely done because they interest you and make you feel whole.
  • Wrong answers include: A pet or family. These aren't passions, they're obligations.
  • KEENAN: I disagree with Rommy on this one because I don't think you can deny that friends, family, and pets are an extremely important part of who we are.  I do, however, agree that we need things that we feel strongly about that are outside of our family ties (or obligations as he says).  With all of the demands and time constraints that our professional lives place upon us, I think it's a-ok to spend your personal time cultivating those relationships.
• What is your perfect meal?
  
  
  • Right answers include: A meal you cook yourself, a nice dinner out, anything that isn't destroying you. Your body is your vessel and should be taken care of as such. But have an opinion, have a perfect meal and have a reason why.
  • Wrong answers include: Fast food, frozen food, processed foods. You want to piss me off, you give a wrong answer here. It's pretty hard to get this one wrong.
  • KEENAN: A meal that includes a few veggies, cheese, probably some pasta, and followed up with something chocolate and sweet.  I have a sweet tooth, a cheesy tooth, and a broccoli tooth.  Don't have a booze tooth, thankfully.  Ideally, I'd be out at a restaurant trying something I'd never make for myself.  I'm thinking more and more about the meat that goes into my body, and trying to be more cognizant about where my food comes from.
• What's the most ridiculous thing you've done?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Having one and not being afraid to share it.
  • Wrong answers include: Not having one and not having anything to share.
  • KEENAN: well, a few things come to mind, but most are not fit for public consumption.  Give me a couple drinks and I'll tell you.
• What was your most embarrassing sexual moment?
  
  
  • We all have one, and the ability to share and laugh about it in retrospect says something about you as a person.
  • Wrong answers include: Not sharing it because you're too embarrassed or ashamed. Or something so horribly weird or fetishistic that it makes for awkwardness (especially if it involves animals). There needs to be a bit of common sense practiced here.
  • KEENAN: this is my blog and I say next question please.
• What is your greatest insecurity?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Acknowledging and sharing any insecurity you have says that you are vulnerable.
  • Wrong answers include: Your nose, your butt, your third nipple. These are not insecurities, they're body parts. And if you really are that insecure with your looks, I will absolutely walk away.
  • KEENAN: being awkward.
• What is your greatest fear?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Anything you struggle to accept that keeps you up at night.
  • Wrong answers include: Ghosts, the Scream movies.
  • KEENAN: not being able to take care of myself, physically, financially or mentally.  Being a bad wife.  Being a bad friend. 
• What was your proudest moment?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Any time in your life that you can look back on and that sets you apart or that took significant guts to do.
  • Wrong answers include: Not having one, or something that most wouldn't consider a challenge or an accomplishment.
  • KEENAN: Completing New York Marathon 2005.  I used to cry in high school and try to skip school when we had to run 1.5 miles for the presidential physical fitness test, so this was a huge personal accomplishment for me.
• How far away from home do you live?
  
  
  • Right answers include: The further the better.
  • Wrong answers include: Still living at home.
  • KEENAN: According to GoogleMaps, 473 miles.  But, someone I worked with at Amazon.com once told me that home is where you live....so, by that logic, I guess I'm there.
• What's the furthest you've lived away from home and for how long?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Halfway around the world or at least in another country (especially if you're in Europe). And for >1 year
  • Wrong answers include: Never leaving home or far enough away so that it matters.
  • KEENAN: Spain for 5 months in 1999, Seattle for 3 years (2,914 miles), and San Francisco for 5 years (2,691 miles).
• If you're close to home, why did you come back?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Because you really love where you're from.
  • Wrong answers include: Because you didn't have anywhere to go, or because "this is just home for me".
  • KEENAN: We wanted to be closer to friends and family.  So far, we've gotten to see much more of both in the 6 months we've been back on the East Coast, and I'm happy about that.
• What was the greatest adventure of your life to date?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Having one or planning one.
  • Wrong answers include: Not liking to take risks.
  • KEENAN: Moving to San Francisco without ever having been to California.  Moving to Seattle without knowing anyone there but Rick, and learning that I loved the city.  Studying abroad in Spain.  Wilderness Ventures in high school and pushing myself physically while there.
• Name three places you want to travel and tell me what you expect to do there.
• KEENAN: Ireland to see where the Keenans came from, India to see textile making, Japan, Argentina to habla, baila and eat delicious steak, Brazil to visit Mary, Greece to relax, Boston, New Mexico to see Sals.... I feel like I am having a huge urge to travel these days, but current unemployment situation precludes this....sad.
• Which person do you admire most in the world?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Someone you know and appreciate for their ability to overcome challenges, for their passions, for their talents, for their achievements.
  • Wrong answers include: Any celebrity.
  • KEENAN: can't pick just one and these are in no particular order.  Bob (he works hard and has interesting hobbies to keep him from being a workaholic, he takes calculated risks, he is funny as hell, and he is adventurous), Pops (he is loyal to the bone and would do absolutely anything for us, he has been an amazing role model for me that hard work and determination pay off, he taught me to always do the right thing, and he is a true South Carolinian), Momsley (she doesn't know how to frown, she's always got a positive attitude, and she's so creative, and she's a peacemaker like I'd like to be), Rick (he has taught me how to challenge and question things, he's taught me that it's ok to disagree, he works his tail off and has a vision for what he wants from his life, and he refuses to accept par....and, he makes me laugh, and like Mom, always wakes up with a smile).  I could go on, but I'm lucky to have good peeps...
• What was a lifechanging moment for you? How did it change your life? How are you different now?
  
  
  • Right answers include: Having one and having a good reason for it.
  • Wrong answers include: Not having one.
  • KEENAN: Geting married...as cliche as it is, it really does start a whole new chapter in my life....I'm different now b/c now I'm a wife and am now part of a 1+1 equation.
• This wasn't one of Rommy's initial questions, but I think it's a good one, albeit a little loaded: What inspires you?
• KEENAN: Smart people who are always questioning, learning, challenging and growing.  People who never know enough and are always pushing themselves.  People who listen and learn from everything around them.  People who are committed to something.

What gives for you? Rommy, thanks for the inspiration....